I blame most of it on Olivia's colic. The child screamed. Every day. Every minute of every day. For 3 solid months. It was terrible. I think that started me off on the wrong foot.
Don't misunderstand me here. I love her with all my heart and soul. She's truly the sunshine in my world and has been the biggest blessing to me. But there has been so much that I've had to change in myself. Letting go of my selfish ways to make room for all her needs first. Putting all my desires on hold so that my time can be spent with her.
I've had a difficult time coming to terms with the fact that I can't pick up and go at the drop of a hat. I can't "plan" at the spur of the moment and take off to go shopping or go have a girls night out. Everything has to be thought out and decided.
"Ok, we're going to be gone for 3 hours. Let me check the diaper bag for diapers, diaper wipes, items of entertainment, medicine, an extra change of clothes, and a sippy cup. How is the weather? Do I need to bring her big jacket or light jacket? Will we need her stroller, food, or booster seat?"
It's been hard enough in my life trying to keep track of myself and now there are two of me to keep track of! I always tell Robby, I married him so I could have a keeper. Someone's gotta keep my head attached after all.
I'm so pleasantly surprised that today, albeit getting a late start to the day, but today, we took a bicycle ride on the Katy Trail as a family!
I feel like I've conquered the Mommy-dom. We successfully took an adventure with the baby (I use that term loosely. She is definitely not my little baby anymore) and we all enjoyed ourselves. It was great.
The beautiful weather was just what the Winter Blues Doctor ordered for us. Nothing like getting rid of (or biding more time from) the dreary February blahs than by getting out to soak up those sun rays and getting fresh, Missouri air.
The trail is nothing but raw nature waiting to encloak you as you travel down the gravel. Bluff on one side. River on the other. Peace and quiet (except for that lady behind us yelling "Coming on the left!").
|Cedar Creek leading to the Mighty Missouri|
Olivia got to ride in her new WeeRide bicycle attachment with Daddy. Unfortunately, my torso was much too short and I wasn't able to support the both of us.
|Except for the time I jumped on scrictly for the photo ops|
|Thank God for Daddies. Especially Daddies who are willing to ride a terribly uncomfortable bicycle bowlegged for miles on end just so his little girl can enjoy!|
I couldn't have asked for more. We got exercise. We had Olivia. We had each other. Robby and I actually had a chance to talk. And listen. To each other. About things we've been needing to discuss. But in our crazy, hectic, insane lives we've been leading, we haven't had time to do. We fall asleep on the couch early, we have separate work schedules, and we have a demanding toddler. Once we had found ourselves actually getting to have a great conversation for about an hour, we realized we had really been needing that bonding time.
The Katy Trail runs along the Missouri River through Jefferson City. If you visit the Missouri State Parks website, you can find detailed information including park maps, accessibility sites, and the like. Hopefully, the sun will find it's way back to us again soon!